Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Dear Michaela,

Okay, I know you have been waiting for the correct answer to yesterday's Where's Michaela puzzle.  And the answer is that you are on the refrigerator in nine places.  That includes the milk carton, which really didn't show up in the photo, so here it is: 

They gave me the milk carton flat, so I had to fold it and put it together, and I taped the bottom, so it's a little rocky.  But it's lasted almost 21 years like this. 

The other eight pictures include two photo buttons, on the top right, as well as a business card with your photo on it that is sticking out of the little basket.  Most of the other pics are pretty easy to see. 

So today's Where's Michaela is a little more difficult.  These are photos from my cubicle at work.  Taking good photos there was a challenge for some reason, so I took several different views ... and still you may have a hard time making out the pictures.  But you can try, and again, I'll tell you the correct answer tomorrow. 

Okay, I'll answer one question.  Yes, I have your photo on a tote bag.  And I carry that tote bag all over the place with me.  I have to confess, I have a minor addition to vistaprint.  They are always sending me e-mails offering free products if you just pay the shipping.  So I have all sorts of things with your picture on them.  Business cards, tote bags, stickers, magnets. 

Anyway, as you can see, I have a job.  I'm a paralegal, and I work mostly in immigration law.  I like my job.  It's interesting, and I work with very nice people, and I generally feel as though I am doing some good in the world.  Or trying to, anyway.  I really care about my clients, and I get very close to many of them, so it makes me sad when we can't help them.  I've only been a paralegal for a couple of years.  Before that I worked in the office at our local high school.  I really enjoyed that.  I love teenagers and young adults, and I liked being there when the kids were there.  I started working there when Libby was in school, and when I told her she said, "You're doing WHAT?"  But it must not have been too bad because she and her friends came into the office to eat their lunch more days than not.  I hardly ever saw Robbie or Ariel.  And I left before Johnna started there.

But today I was thinking about when we watched that movie about the woman who inherited a baby from a relative who had died.  The woman had been a high powered, ambitious executive, and she ended up quitting her job and moving to the country with the baby.  I remember you cried, and you said, "When I grow up, I want to be just like you, and stay home to take care of my children."  And you know, that's where my heart has always been, at home with my kids.  Now they've gotten old enough that they really don't miss me when I'm gone, and they don't usually need me, except for Johnna who needs rides still because she doens't drive yet.  Now I have dogs who really miss me when I'm gone, and I feel bad about leaving them all day when I go to work! 

So I wonder, do you have children?  And do you get to stay home with them?  I can't imagine you going out to work every day, but I can't imagine where you are at all.  Perhaps you are with someone you really like, someone you really care about.  Perhaps you are afraid to come home because you don't want to get him in trouble.  Have I said this before, or have I just thought it?  I can understand that.  But I really need to know that you are okay.  And if you have children, I'd love to at least see a photo.

But you know what I'd really love to do, is I'd love to hold you in my arms.  I just want to hold you, and pour out all the love I haven't been able to give you in the last almost 21 years. 

To start with, I'd be happy to get an e-mail, a comment on this blog.  Anything.  Just let me know you are okay, please?

Love you forever, Michaela.  You are still my baby girl.



  1. Dear Sharon,

    I do hope Michaela reads your letters and sees all the pictures you have posted and responds to you really, really soon, perhaps even tonight or tomorrow, in however small a way.

    I've been thinking a lot about all the coincidences you have talked about in recent blogs - your difficulty in becoming pregnant with her only to have her gone less than 10 years later; the striking poem Michaela wrote one week before her abduction; the girls forgetting their scooters when they first emerged from the market (as you said, God's final attempt at stopping what was to happen next), etc. and I was wondering if you've read Deepak Chopra's "The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire". It is a book that really helped me when I needed it (coincidentally, I ran into an old friend who lent it to me just when I could really use it) and it is primarily about how one can best recognize coincidences in one's life and then capitalize on them and purposefully and intentionally make them occur more and more in one's life, essentially creating one's own "good luck" so to speak and ultimately leading to the fulfillment of one's desires from moment to moment and day to day. Since reading the book and practicing what it preaches, I do feel that the number of positive coincidences have increased dramatically in my own life, almost as if a Universal Spirit is working alongside with me creating my life as I choose it.

    If you haven't read this book, then you might want to know that the very thoughts that got me to write this to you tonight are not coincidences. In fact, there is no such thing as a coincidence, as Chopra says. What we perceive as coincidences are messages from God, so yes, Michaela's poem, that haunting e-mail you received on October 26, the fact that Johnna was born right when you saw Michaela's pic on TV, etc. are all about a powerful, universal, all-encompassing force that loves you dearly and is trying to communicate with you and trying to lead you to what you want - the return of Michaela to you.

    Please do read the book if you haven't already done so.

    Take care of yourself and thinking about you.

  2. Brought tears to my eyes. I really hope Michaela reads it, and responds to you very soon. Hugs!

  3. I totally feel that Michaela may be reading your blog----I hope and pray that she is and you hear from her---Please, anyone that knows anything at all about Michaelas disappearance---please get it off your chest and respond!!!!!

  4. Thanks for letting us get a peek into your private life. Michaela should look forward to being reunited with her family, and your words and pictures will probably make her homesick! I hope they do, and she contacts you soon!

    Praying for you,

  5. Just wanted you to know that I stopped by your blog like I always do. You have now become a part of my life and I look forward to reading what you have to say. I love these messages to Michaela..I always wonder everyday where Michaela is too. I think about her a lot. I really want to talk to her and find out everything I can about her. So Michaela, please send us a message please, we really want to know where you are...

  6. I agree with the above - I love the way you spoke out to Michaela and her captor on the Missing Michaela website. Thank you for letting us into your lives through the Dear Michaela theme - I feel like I know you and Michaela better even though I have never met you. I love the Dear Michaela series - it makes me want to respond and say I am Michaela!! Perhaps Michaela will feel this way too and defy her captor or any syndrome.

    Speaking of coincidences, how interesting is that you started this blog just a couple of weeks before Jaycee was found? It looks like you may have also started the Missing Michaela site in 2009. I had googled Michaela and saw news about a new lead being chased in Michaela's case just a few weeks before Jaycee was found. Stay strong and hopeful in your positive outcome - what else is there to hope for? Positive thoughts can lead to positive results.

    As far as the Where's Michaela game - I am counting six above.

    Your mom has such a deep and profound love for you. I am so jealous you have so many siblings!! Your family has so much love waiting for you and any new family members you may have. Please do not be afraid to call and go home - they can help you.


  7. Diana, you are right. I'd had a myspace for Michaela for years, but I'd just made the move to a real website, and I'd just started this blog when Jaycee was found. It's as though God waited until it was all in place and then catapulted it to international attention. SO MUCH has been like that in this last year. I keep thinking, it can't all be for nothing.

  8. I hope and pray that anyone that reads this and has any thought of perpetrating a fraud on you will not be allowed to do so. May God stop them in there tracks!
    I hope the real Michaela writes you soon!!

    God Bless!!!

  9. I stop by to read your blog every month, sometimes more. It always gets me emotional. You connect so much through your writing & I will always pray , until the day she is found, that michaela contacts you somehow. I have alwys felt connecte dto michaela somehow, even though id never met her & lived in the next county. To this day, I still feel connected, and that she will be found. Love & Light to you Sharon
    Melody H