Friday, April 23, 2010

The Lovely Bones

"These were the lovely bones, that had grown around my absence,
 the connections, sometimes tenuous, sometimes made at great cost,
 but often magnificent,
that happened, after I was gone. 
And I began to see things in a way ... 
that let me hold the world, without me in it."

These are my favorite lines from the movie "The Lovely Bones," which I just watched tonight.  Having read the book years ago, I was fully prepared to be devastated by this movie -- so much so that I was afraid to go to the movie theater to watch it and chose to wait for the DVD so I could watch it at home.  It's been so long since I read the book that I couldn't compare the two, although I've heard there are a lot of differences.  But I was really pleasantly surprised to find the movie actually left me feeling a bit uplifted instead of devastated.

Of course, you all know that The Lovely Bones is about Susie Salmon, a 14-year old girl who has been murdered.  It is about her spirit, which is hovering in the "in between," not quite ready to leave this earth behind for heaven.  She watches over the people she cares about, and over the man who murdered her.  I thought the movie was visually beautiful in its depiction of the "in between."  I think it didn't probe the family's grief quite as deeply as it could have, but if it had that probably would have put a bit of a damper on the uplifting part.

The saddest part of the film, to me, was when Susie witnessed her younger sister getting her first kiss.  Susie was happy for her sister, but sad because it was something she would never get to experience.  So often since Michaela has been gone these things have crossed my mind, all the things that Michaela's friends are doing, that her brothers and sisters are doing -- growing up, loving, having families -- that Michaela did not have the opportunity to do.  (That's an assumption, I know, but you know what I mean.)  

But these words at the end just reverberated through me, because they are so true.  These terrible things that happen are pebbles tossed into the stream of our lives every bit as much as the good and indifferent.  I am fully aware of how drastically the course of my life changed because of Michaela's kidnapping.  I am also aware of the many, many, many blessings that have come my way as a result of it. There are so many people I have come to know and love because of Michaela -- the connections which are  sometimes tenuous, certainly at great cost, and yet they are often magnificent. When you get right down to it, even though there is no direct connection, I doubt I would ever have had my youngest child if Michaela had not been kidnapped. So these are the "lovely bones" in my life, I guess, the things that have grown up around Michaela's absence that have slowly, but surely, inevitably, cushioned those places that hurt the most just enough to allow life to go on.  

It was uplifting, in the movie, watching Susie Salmon find peace.  I just hope that Michaela has found peace as well, wherever she may be.

8 comments:

  1. I'm so glad that you wrote a blog about the movie. I too read the book many years ago. I just rented the movie and haven't watched it yet. I'm so glad that you found it uplifting. It makes me want to watch it even more.
    I hope and pray thatMichaela has found peace too. I think of her and you a lot! You are an amazing mother and person!
    Kim

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  2. Im glad you watched and found it uplifting, at the end where she says i wish you all a long and happy life she was at peace, i know Michaela is too if she has crossed over.... I thought about you so much when i saw the movie. I hear that a girl really did die in that area in a corn field im not sure but the movie was so well written, it reminded me of your writings, hugs always....

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  3. Its one of those movies that stays with you, i noticed how she thought she escaped the hole but later said she died there so maybe god spares the children of what really happens to them ya know, very moving..... God cant take away mans free will but he can spare pain and suffering and also brought suffering down apon that man in the end.

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  4. I hope Michaela has found peace, too.

    Brenda

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  5. Just in case you wondered, the reason this blog entry looks funny is because I had to change the text color due to a blogspot error, and accidentally changed the background color instead and couldn't figure out how to get rid of it! No "real" meaning to it!

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  6. Sharon, I went to see the Lovely Bones a couple of months ago just because of you and Michaela.
    For months now I've felt very close to you and Michaela by reading your blog, but this movie made me feel even closer to you both. I can understand how this movie and book touched you. The young actress portraying Susie is incredibly sweet and her acting superb. Susie is a true angel, just like Michaela.
    Noemi

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  7. Dear Sharon

    Ever since reading this part of you blog I have been searching for this movi in our DVD rental shops here in johannesburg where I live, and finally found it yesterday.

    About an hour after watching this I got the call that my Gran had just passed away.

    I think I was meant to finally find this Dvd yesterday...

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  8. Esta, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.... I hope this story brought you some hope. I honestly believe that this life is just a part of our journey, and you will meet your Gran again.

    God bless,
    Sharon

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