You are always in my heart, always in my thoughts. Not a day goes by that I don't think about you, and I will never stop looking for answers. But my hope ... well, I've said it before ... hope long unfulfilled is one of the most difficult things to hold onto. So I let myself fall back into that state of resignation to the likely fact that you will never return to me.
Recently, though, I have been discussing you in an astrology e-mail group. One of the people in the group took a look at your chart for the time of your kidnapping. I have posted those comments on my other blog at http://thewanderingjourney.blogspot.com/2010/06/astrology-reading-for-michaelas.html. But essentially, he said he didn't see your death in your chart.
And again, I was talking about the circumstances of your kidnapping. I talked about your poem. I repeated your words, that the poem was about "people who had been kidnapped and were being held captive." People who were still alive. If you ever told me anything about what happened to you, you told me you were still alive.
I just need to know, Michaela. This astrologer suggests a new set of parents, as though perhaps you became attached to whoever has you, like Jaycee did. Maybe you want to protect them, like Jaycee did. But I am just begging you, pleading with you, please don't forget about me. Please don't forget the bond between us. Please, please extend to me at least a degree of that caring and spare me from this continual, continual pain of yearning and not knowing. If you don't want to come home, just let me know that you are alive, let me know that you are okay. Please!
I love you forever, Michaela. I know that you love me, too. Please, speak to me.