Monday, December 23, 2013

Merry Christmas

Michaela's First Christmas Ornament
on our tree, 2013
Merry Christmas, everybody. I must admit I'm feeling a little blue this season. I miss Michaela at holidays, of course, but I am finding that a lot of the Christmas spirit has been lost since all the kids have grown up. They grow up, they move away, they get partners and have second families, they just get busy with their own lives. They don't get excited about opening presents on Christmas morning because those $20 dolls or action figures just don't do it for them anymore, and I can't afford the things that do!

My oldest son and my granddaughters live a few hours away, and they also have their mother's family close by. My girls are both talking about moving to another state (realistic for only one at the present time). I love my adult children, and generally find them to be more interesting and exciting now than they were as children, but this moving on business, well I can't say I'm terribly in favor of all that.

Michaela, if you are out there somewhere, I am sad for all the Christmases we have spent apart. I am sad for all the little girl growing up presents I was not able to give to you, for all the love and excitement we missed sharing. It would be the greatest Christmas gift in the world to me if I could see you again, hold you in my arms, give you even the tiniest fraction of the love I have been holding for you all these years. Do you have children? I would love to know them, love to have them here to share the holidays with our family. I love you. I love what is yours.

To everyone else who has read this blog, who has held Michaela in their hearts whether they knew her or never met her, thank you, and I wish you a warm and loving holiday season and a new year filled with all good things.

And thank you.  <3 p="">


  1. Blessed Holidays and New Year to YOU <3

  2. Thank you Sharon for sharing your heart with all of us. Like I always say you are such an inspiration to me. I would love for your Christmas gift this year to be Michaela in your loving arms.
    My heart hurts for you every day because I don't think I could have went through all you've been through and what you continue to go through. You are one amazing lady and you deserve the best!
    I will never loose hope of Michaela coming home to you. Prayers always for You, Michaela, and All of your Family. I'm sending this link with this song with Whitney Houston and Miriah Carey called "When You Believe" I know you believe but I thought it was a song you might enjoy.
    from Thelma Mandera <3

    1. Holiday Greetings Everyone! SHARON it is always nice to read updates from you -Even when the journey is difficult you express yourself in a special way that touches the heart deeply .THELMA I so luv reading your kind , thoughtful & supportive comments -the song link is beautiful--Thru this Blog and FB pg Love for MICHAELA has brought together such beautiful people from around the world.< Along with many others Sharon I look forward to getting a copy of your published book when it comes out :-)

  3. Hello, Sharon.

    Merry Christmas Eve from New Jersey. I'm just a woman who came upon your story when reading about Jaycee a few years ago. I read your blog all the time, hoping for, optimally, a happy ending for you. In the meantime, all we out here in cyber world can do is send you loving thoughts and direct positive energy toward Michaela.

    Every year we place poinsettias in the front of the church for the Christmas service; people dedicate them to those that they love.
    One of the poinsettias in this picture was placed there in honor of (not memory of) Michaela. Her name was also in the bulletin and I labeled her as a missing child as she is YOUR child. The church is beautiful, over 200 years old, with Gothic columns, stained glass windows, organ pipes across the top balcony, balconies on all sides and candles glowing on the ledges of all the balconies. I'm trying to give you a mental picture so that you can feel the beauty and know that thoughts of Michaela were blossoming in the midst of it.

    I had my daughter rush over after the service (I'm the organist so I'm busy) and snap this shot before people started taking their flowers home. It's soooooo frantic Christmas morning before church (choir rehearsing, etc.) that I didn't have a chance to even glance at the flowers beforehand. Looking at the picture later, though, I noticed the box that says "JOY" sitting there right in the middle and it made me smile.

    Wishing you peace,
    jeanne johnson

    p.s. I have copied this note and sent it to with a picture of the poinsettias. I couldn't figure out how to attach a picture here and I'm not sure if you will get the e-mail so I did both.

    1. Thank you! That is so beautiful! It means so much to me!